Cynical
Lester J. Pourciau on Politics
“There is no monument dedicated to the memory of a committee.” Lester J. Pourciau
Bertrand Russell on Happiness
“If there were in the world today any large number of people who desired their own happiness more than they desired the unhappiness of others, we could have paradise in a few years.” Bertrand Russell British author, mathematician, & philosopher (1872 – 1970)
Oscar Wilde on Business
“My own business always bores me to death; I prefer other people’s.” Oscar Wilde, Lady Windermere’s Fan, 1892 Irish dramatist, novelist, & poet (1854 – 1900)
Elbert Hubbard on Journalism
“Editor: a person employed by a newspaper, whose business it is to separate the wheat from the chaff, and to see that the chaff is printed.” Elbert Hubbard US author (1856 – 1915)
Robert Benchley on Quotations
“The surest way to make a monkey of a man is to quote him.” Robert Benchley US actor, author, & humorist (1889 – 1945)
Anonymous on Power
“All power corrupts, but we need the electricity.” Unknown
Charles Peters on Politics
“Bureaucrats write memoranda both because they appear to be busy when they are writing and because the memos, once written, immediately become proof that they were busy.” Charles Peters
Blore’s Razor
“Given a choice between two theories, take the one which is funnier.” Blore’s Razor
E. V. Lucas on Tardiness
“I have noticed that the people who are late are often so much jollier than the people who have to wait for them.” E. V. Lucas
Margaret Millar Cynical Quote
“Most conversations are simply monologues delivered in the presence of witnesses.” Margaret Millar
John Russell on Sanity
“Sanity calms, but madness is more interesting.” John Russell
Philip Johnson on Architecture
“Architecture is the art of how to waste space.” Philip Johnson US architect (1906 – 2005)
Paul Valery on Politics
“Politics is the art of preventing people from taking part in affairs which properly concern them.” Paul Valery, Tel Quel 2 (1943) French critic & poet (1871 – 1945)
Helen Rowland on Marriage
“One man’s folly is another man’s wife.” Helen Rowland (1876 – 1950)
Aldous Huxley on Improvement
“There is only one corner of the universe you can be certain of improving, and that’s your own self.” Aldous Huxley
Mark Twain on Life
“When we remember we are all mad, the mysteries disappear and life stands explained.” Mark Twain US humorist, novelist, short story author (1835 – 1910)
Franklin Pierce Adams Cynical Quote
“Seeing ourselves as others see us would probably confirm our worst suspicions about them.” Franklin Pierce Adams US journalist (1881 – 1960)
Friedrich Nietzsche’s Cynical Quote
“Talking much about oneself can also be a means to conceal oneself.” Friedrich Nietzsche German philosopher (1844 – 1900)
Laurence J. Peter on Clutter
“If a cluttered desk is the sign of a cluttered mind, what is the significance of a clean desk?” Laurence J. Peter US educator & writer (1919 – 1988)
Ronald Reagan on Politics
“Politics is not a bad profession. If you succeed there are many rewards, if you disgrace yourself you can always write a book.” Ronald Reagan 40th president of US (1911 – 2004)
Ambrose Bierce on Science
“There is nothing new under the sun but there are lots of old things we don’t know.” Ambrose Bierce, The Devil’s Dictionary US author & satirist (1842 – 1914)
George Bernard Shaw on England and America
“England and America are two countries separated by a common language.” George Bernard Shaw Irish dramatist (1856 – 1950)
Benjamin Franklin on Politics
“All human situations have their inconveniences. We feel those of the present but neither see nor feel those of the future; and hence we often make troublesome changes without amendment, and frequently for the worse.” Benjamin Franklin US author, diplomat, inventor, physicist, politician, & printer (1706 – 1790)
George Carlin on Freedom
“Well, if crime fighters fight crime and fire fighters fight fire, what do freedom fighters fight? They never mention that part to us, do they?” George Carlin US comedian and actor (1937 – 2008)
Oscar Wilde on Knowledge
“There are only two kinds of people who are really fascinating: people who know absolutely everything, and people who know absolutely nothing.” Oscar Wilde Irish dramatist, novelist, & poet (1854 – 1900)
Oscar Wilde on Wisdom
“Only the shallow know themselves.” Oscar Wilde, “Phrases and Philosophies for the Use of the Young”, 1882 Irish dramatist, novelist, & poet (1854 – 1900)
Edmond de Goncourt on Art
“A painting in a museum hears more ridiculous opinions than anything else in the world.” Edmond de Goncourt French artist & novelist (1822 – 1896)
Poul Anderson on Problems
“I have yet to see any problem, however complicated, which, when you looked at it in the right way, did not become still more complicated.” Poul Anderson US science fiction author (1926 – 2001)
Evan Esar on Statistics
“Statistics: The only science that enables different experts using the same figures to draw different conclusions.” Evan Esar, Esar’s Comic Dictionary American Humorist (1899 – 1995)
John Ciardi on Politics
“The Constitution gives every American the inalienable right to make a damn fool of himself.” John Ciardi US poet (1916 – 1986)
Madeleine L’Engle Cynical Quote
“It takes too much energy to be against something unless it’s really important.” Madeleine L’Engle US juvenile science fiction novelist (1918 – )
Jose Marti on Suffering
“Man has to suffer. When he has no real afflictions, he invents some.” Jose Marti
Harry S Truman Cynical Quote
“If you cannot convince them, confuse them.” Harry S Truman 33rd president of US (1884 – 1972)
T. S. Eliot on Humanity
“Humankind cannot stand very much reality.” T. S. Eliot British (US-born) critic, dramatist & poet (1888 – 1965)
Johnny Carson on Politics
“Democracy means that anyone can grow up to be president, and anyone who doesn’t grow up can be vice president.” Johnny Carson US comedian & television host (1925 – 2005)
Oscar Wilde on Seriousness
“Seriousness is the only refuge of the shallow.” Oscar Wilde Irish dramatist, novelist, & poet (1854 – 1900)
Jerome K. Jerome on Work
“I like work: it fascinates me. I can sit and look at it for hours.” Jerome K. Jerome, “Three Men in a Boat”, 1889 British humor writer (1859 – 1927)
George F. Will on Pessimism
“The nice part about being a pessimist is that you are constantly being either proven right or pleasantly surprised.” George F. Will US editor, commentator, & columnist (1941 – )
Robertson Davies on Children
“A happy childhood has spoiled many a promising life.” Robertson Davies, “What’s Bred in the Bone”
Bertrand Russell on Injustice
“In the part of this universe that we know there is great injustice, and often the good suffer, and often the wicked prosper, and one hardly knows which of those is the more annoying.” Bertrand Russell British author, mathematician, & philosopher (1872 – 1970)
Thomas Merton on Education
“The least of learning is done in the classrooms.” Thomas Merton US religious author, clergyman, & Trappist monk (1915 – 1968)-
Russell Baker on Misery
“Misery no longer loves company. Nowadays it insists on it.” Russell Baker US columnist & journalist (1925 – )
Gordon R. Dickson on Advice
“Some people like my advice so much that they frame it upon the wall instead of using it.” Gordon R. Dickson
Ambrose Bierce Philosophical Quote
“Cogito cogito ergo cogito sum (I think that I think, therefore I think that I am.)” Ambrose Bierce, The Devil’s Dictionary US author & satirist (1842 – 1914)
H. L. Mencken on Age & Wisdom
“The older I grow the more I distrust the familiar doctrine that age brings wisdom.” H. L. Mencken US editor (1880 – 1956)
Eugene McCarthy on Politics
“It is dangerous for a national candidate to say things that people might remember.” Eugene McCarthy US politician (1916 – 2005)
Arthur Schopenhauer Cynical Quote
“Every nation ridicules other nations, and all are right.” Arthur Schopenhauer German philosopher (1788 – 1860)
Mark Twain Cynical Quote on Politics
“Suppose you were an idiot and suppose you were a member of Congress. But I repeat myself.” Mark Twain US humorist, novelist, short story author, & wit (1835 – 1910)
Frank Wilczek on Physics
“In physics, you don’t have to go around making trouble for yourself – nature does it for you.” Frank Wilczek American physicist (1951 – )
Robert Copeland on Committees
“To get something done, a committee should consist of no more than three men, two of whom are absent.” Robert Copeland
Jeffery F. Chamberlain on America
“In a country as big as the United States, you can find fifty examples of anything.” Jeffery F. Chamberlain
Louise Beal on Society
“Love thy neighbour as yourself, but choose your neighbourhood.” Louise Beal
Doug Larson on Age
“The surprising thing about young fools is how many survive to become old fools.” Doug Larson
Ernest Benn on Politics
“Politics is the art of looking for trouble, finding it whether it exists or not, diagnosing it incorrectly, and applying the wrong remedy.” Ernest Benn
Gian Vincenzo Gravina Cynical Quote
“A bore is a man who deprives you of solitude without providing you with company.” Gian Vincenzo Gravina (1664 – 1718)
Fran Lebowitz on Success
“Success didn’t spoil me, I’ve always been insufferable.” Fran Lebowitz US writer and humorist (1950 – )
Francois de La Rochefoucauld on Faults
“We confess our little faults to persuade people that we have no large ones.” Francois de La Rochefoucauld French author & moralist (1613 – 1680)
Charles De Gaulle on Politics
“How can you govern a country which has 246 varieties of cheese?” Charles De Gaulle, in “Les Mots du General”, 1962 French general & politician (1890 – 1970)
Movie Quote on Health and Economy
“The entire economy of the Western world is built on things that cause cancer.” From the 1985 movie “Bliss”
Benjamin Franklin on Secrets
“Three may keep a secret, if two of them are dead.” Benjamin Franklin US author, diplomat, inventor, physicist, politician, & printer (1706 – 1790)